Announcing May the 4th Reviews of the Star Wars Saga

(Originally written for Jedi News.)

So I was thinking a number of things. 1. How was I going to celebrate the 30^th anniversary of Return of the Jedi? 2. What can I write for this space that waxes nostalgic while still looking hard at the subject matter? 3. What can I do to keep positive amidst the latest surge of negativity?

Well, I decided to throw my hat in the ring and bring full reviews of the Star Wars Saga.

Anatomy of a Scene: Grievous Challenges Kenobi

(Originally written for Jedi News.)

I got a comment on last week’s article from a frequent reader of this blog. This particular poster doesn’t think much of Episodes I-III, but since he’s (usually) respectful and we’ve agreed in other areas he’s earned my utmost respect as a passionate film fan, even when I think his criticism misses the mark.

Staring into the Abyss

Regarding yesterday's SW/Disney post: Perhaps "Dead" is too strong a word.

Oh I'm angry. Angry and hurt. Not the least because I trusted Disney to do the right thing and they let me down flat again and again, even after I defended them. If they had done just one of the many things they've been doing, I'd be shaken but still cautiously optimistic. But no, each new bit of news is like a kick in the gut.

However, as I was trying to explain my anger and my outrage, I almost said the unthinkable. I started with "They're..." and then I stopped cold. I was one step away from saying the most offensive and hyperbolic of the hateboy memes. One I've been personally trying to ban from the lexicon for years.

But I will not say it. I'm throwing my lightsaber away on this one. I'm putting down the deathsticks to go home and rethink my life.

The last month or so has been very tough. I don't talk about news of the world here because this is the place to get away from all that, but things like the gun debate and the tragedy in Boston do weigh heavily on me and my heart goes out to all the victims (I also humbly request people keep politics out of the comments). Add all that on top of my own financial worries, time management issues, and just overall daily struggles most of the time, and I've been in rather a blah place. Now, on top of everything, this stuff happens. I was legitimately depressed yesterday. No matter what I did, and how much fun and good and relaxation I took, I still couldn't get happy.

I just needed a little bit of perspective.

What Disney has been doing is still not okay with me. Unfortunately, there's no real way to tell them that in a way they'll take seriously except with my wallet. I knew yesterday, however, that there was no way I'd be able to totally boycott Disney. There's too much I want, too much I love, that will wind its way back to them. The best I can do is be even more selective with what I spend my money on than I already am, show them there's a market they may not believe exists. At the very least, I plan on producing a number of I-III t-shirts, wearing them proudly, and if anyone gives me stink about it say I'd gladly pay for authentic ones if they existed. Keep my merchandise collecting strictly to I-III and Clone Wars era characters (except for Tarkin - I've been waiting for him for too long) until I'm satisfied that the entire saga will be kept in tact. I've been avoiding Angry Birds Star Wars because it always felt like Angry Birds Half Star Wars, but if they do decide to add levels for I-III I'll not only get it, but I will PAY for the full version. I urge any like-minded fans to do the same: pay only when they give you what you really want and don't settle, and perhaps they'll come around.

However, I can't take any of this personally, because it's not personal. In fact, it's as insultingly impersonal as it gets. If George Lucas Owes Me Nothing (tm), then neither does Disney. That's what we all need to remember as this goes on.

R.I.P. Richard LeParmentier

If you don't recognize the name, you'll recognize the face. I never really knew his name, but he played two small but memorable roles in two of my favorite films of all time.

I first saw him as Lt. Santino, Eddie's police contact in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"

Of course his most memorable role would be Imperial Admiral Motti, whose lack of faith Darth Vader found disturbing in "A New Hope."

This past Monday, Richard died suddenly at age 66. None of my sources mentioned cause of death, but I'm sure that information will be available soon. In any case, it doesn't matter. What matters is that he was a talented actor and he will be missed.

So This Is How Liberty Dies: With Thundrous Applause

I was having such a good day. I read a great Grievous meme on Memebase, my Jar Jar Mimobot came in (and it's #66!!!!), I came up with some great I-III t-shirt designs I'm going to make if I can.

Then I read this.

So not only is Star Wars continuing to go to hell (thanks, hateboys), but the traditional Disney animation is gone too.

Disney, you're dead to me. I don't know at this point how much I'm going to be willing or able to give up seeing as you own so much that I love, but somehow, some way, I need to show you that this is NOT okay.

And We Did All That Without Computers

(Originally Written for Jedi News)

One of my favorite non-SW films is Jurassic Park, which is celebrating its 20^th anniversary this year and seeing its very own 3D rerelease.

Like What You Wanna Like! Defenses of Underappreciated Films (And More!) Part 2!

Last week I asked you all to write in with media and franchises you love that seem to have a sizable hatedom (aside from I-III, since I always talk about them). I swore that I would talk a little bit about each with the following rules:

1. If I liked it too, I would praise it for its greatness.

2. If I didn't like it, I would be honest with my criticism while still emphasizing both your right to like it and its right to exist, plus finding at least one genuinely nice thing to say about it (and not dismissing it as alltogether "bad" regardless of how I feel).

3. If I haven't seen it, I'll explain why while refusing to pass too much judgement and, again, emphasizing both your right to like it and its right to exist.

You all gave me a lot of great things to talk about that fall into all three categories. You gave me so much that, while I envisioned this as a single post, Blogspot wouldn't let me put all the necessary tags on it requiring me to split it into two. Yesterday I gave you all the superhero stuff, and now it's time for the thrilling conclusion!

Some Spoilers ahead.

Like What You Wanna Like! Defenses of Underappreciated Films (And More!) Part 1!

Last week I asked you all to write in with media and franchises you love that seem to have a sizable hatedom (aside from I-III, since I always talk about them). I swore that I would talk a little bit about each with the following rules:

1. If I liked it too, I would praise it for its greatness.

2. If I didn't like it, I would be honest with my criticism while still emphasizing both your right to like it and its right to exist, plus finding at least one genuinely nice thing to say about it (and not dismissing it as alltogether "bad" regardless of how I feel).

3. If I haven't seen it, I'll explain why while refusing to pass too much judgement and, again, emphasizing both your right to like it and its right to exist.

You all gave me a lot of great things to talk about that fall into all three categories. You gave me so much that, while I envisioned this as a single post, Blogspot wouldn't let me put all the necessary tags on it requiring me to split it into two. This actually worked out for the best, since about half of the suggestions came from Superhero stuff. I'll start with that and give the rest of you a little more time to suggest more.

Some Spoilers ahead.

Never Give Up, Never Surrender

(Originally Written for Jedi News)

I had another article planned for this week. It’ll still get here, but I’m pushing it to next week because there’s a very important topic I want to discuss.

Those of us who are true, true Saga fans are being beaten down left and right. Our morale is weak anyway due to Disney not taking the Marvel/Pixar “hands-off” approach we had hoped for and instead gutting Star Wars and Lucasfilm like a boned fish (Disney, I grew up with you, but you’re making it really really hard to say anything nice about you right now). But with the sale, the haters have come out of the woodwork anew. That’s why I wrote the post that landed me this column in the first place.

With all this hatred and ignorance, it seems that many of us are starting to bend. Many of us are being beaten down by the storm that we’re devolving.

We’re becoming apologists.

Well, no, I’m sorry. I’m not going to apologize. I have nothing to apologize for. Neither does George Lucas or the cast and crew of any of the Star Wars films.

Am I willing to concede that I-III aren’t perfect? Well, it is the truth. Nothing IS perfect, after all. But…screw it. I won’t concede. In my eyes, they ARE perfect. Or as near to as can be achieved. I might be persuaded to concede that point if everyone else concedes that IV-VI weren’t perfect either, and for all the same reasons. In fact, I’ll go into much more detail on that in a month’s time (stay tuned).

People who love I-III and the Saga as a whole may very well have their own problems with them. But by giving the rabid haters an inch, we’re allowing them to take a mile and still be the dominant thought process. History is written by the winners. It doesn’t matter that all the films were box office smashes. It doesn’t matter that all the films had as many good reviews as bad ones. It doesn’t matter that a new generation grew up loving all of Star Wars. By conceding in any of these points, even if we can see where they’re coming from, we’re allowing the “OT = Perfect, PT = Garbage” fallacy to live on and become validated. And as I and many others have pointed out for the last fourteen years or so, all the complaints are shaky at best and come down entirely to personal tastes.

I will say again and again, to all the armchair critics, pretentious auteur-wannabies, hipsters, cynics, trolls, and executives: All of the Star Wars films are good movies. I’m even done with “if you find X a bad thing then they’re all bad” line. No, they’re good, well-made movies. You don’t have to like them, hell there are plenty of objectively good movies I can’t stand because they’re not my style. But you can’t deny the hard work that went into all six Star Wars films, nor the fact that they all continue to succeed in striking a chord with their intended audiences. Anyone who does is either completely ignorant or lying through their teeth, and nobody will ever be able to convince me otherwise. Those of you who praise IV-VI for their direction, cinematography, effects, and performance should see the same caliber in I-III because it’s there. If your “trained eyes” can’t see it, then you are blinded by something I can’t begin to imagine and nothing I say will make you see what’s in front of your face, so I’ll no longer waste my breath. You know what to look for, so you find it. It’s there, I swear.

And before you start calling me a hypocrite, I never ever state something is a fact without empirical proof, either from what the movies are saying or what Lucas and the cast and crew have said in the myriad of books, interviews, and making-of documentaries. Any time I present a debatable interpretation, I do try to label it as such. I’m also stressing that I’m not trying to force anyone to think exactly as I think, merely to intelligently examine the material before putting someone else down for liking it.

I love Star Wars. There is no such thing as an “Original Trilogy.” There is no such thing as a “Prequel Trilogy.” There is no such thing as “Special Editions” or “Expanded Universe” or “Clone Wars.” There is simply the Star Wars Saga. And I love the Star Wars Saga truly, deeply, unabashedly.

No apologies. Not now, not ever.

Calling All Readers! Defense Post Ahead!

Due to my constant praise of the entire Star Wars Saga, as well as yesterday's Jedi News article (which will appear here in a few short hours), I wanted to offer something to all of my readers.

I-III in particular are much maligned in popular culture for, as I've argued many times, no discernible good reason whatsoever. And I know for a fact that these are not the only ones.

So, dear readers, tell me some of your favorite things that seem to have a sizable hatedom. Pour it out to me, and I'll talk about them all in a post in the coming weeks.

If I like it too, it will be praised!

If I don't like it, I will respectfully explain why while still defending its right to exist and your right to like it! (unless it's something completely horrible like Nazi Propaganda or something). I will even find at least one nice thing to say about it!

If I haven't seen it or even heard of it, I will not pass judgement either way, and I will defend its right to exist and your right to like it!

Let's celebrate!

UPDATE 4/9/13: This will be split into two posts - Superheroes on Thursday the 11th, and The Rest on Friday the 12th. You guys have until then to give me any more.