Thursday, May 31, 2012

No Wheezing the Joo-ooce!

This is May's final Anniversary Review (more on that later), and although I do adore this movie, I'm not sure if it would be worth talking about were it not for the careers it launched.

Encino Man is 20.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Al On Film

While writing today's anniversary review, I got to thinking about Weird Al. I love his Polka Medleys and Original/Style Parodies more than his straight parodies, but my favorite straight parodies of his are when he parodies an older song and writes the lyrics about a then-current release. I'd like to share these with you all now,'s awesome.

He's done this three times (I don't necessarily count "Yoda", since neither source was that old and it wasn't a whole plot reference), and in all three cases it was about a film that changed my movie-going life:

Follow That Cold Shiver Running Down Your Spine

I did this slightly out of order, I know. I listed this one before AotC, but I had limited time yesterday and since AotC was already written and I wanted to say some words on The Avengers, this is what happened.

This is going to be a combination anniversary reflection and current brain vomit. It's not for the faint of heart.

Ten years ago, three films had my vote for the best of the year. First was AotC, natch. Second was The Two Towers, more on that come December.

The third, and the first one out of the gate was Sam Raimi's "Spider-Man"

Monday, May 28, 2012


It's all been leading up to this...

It May Be Difficult to Secure Your Release...

I've been celebrating the 10-year anniversary of "Attack of the Clones" everywhere lately. I've already poured my heart out to The Star Wars Prequel Appreciation Society for their "Memories" contest. Here, for my Anniversary Review of AotC, I am going to reprint my entry:

Sunday, May 27, 2012

The Logic is Erratic

This is the last "make-up" (read: non-May) Anniversary Review this month. Next week I'll be scrambling to talk about what actually came out in May before its over.

For now, FernGully: The Last Rainforest is 20.

Friday, May 25, 2012

A Symphony of Horror

Guess what? Here's another "cultural significance" Anniversary review! But cut me some slack, it's not every day that the world's most famous rip-off turns 90.

Okay, that might be a bit harsh for one of the most influential silent films of all time. But it's the truth. F.W. Murnau wanted to make "Dracula", Bram Stoker's widow denied him the rights, and he simply filmed it anyway and changed the names. Thus, Nosferatu was born.

And let me tell you, Max Schreck's Count Olaf still freaks me the hell out to this day, which is about what I take away from the film when I see it. It's rather distracting.

But don't take my word for it. Since it did kind of violate copyright, all copies of the film were ordered burned shortly after release. Thanks to some bootlegs, it escaped destruction (so...yay piracy?) and is available for free here

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Leave the Gun, Take the Cannoli

This is another one that I'm only really talking about because of its cultural significance. However, while I've enjoyed the other "classic" mob movies to a point, this is the one I would watch over and over again. I actually meant to watch it again in preparation for this review, but time isn't always on my side these days.

The Godfather is 40.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

There Can Be Only...Oops, Wrong "-Lander"

So my wife got me the 3DS version of "Skylanders: Spyro's Adventure" as an early birthday present (and to make up for buying The Sims 3 for herself when we've agreed to cut spending; yes I'm aware that's counterproductive and I don't care). Here are my first impressions:

I Would LOVE to Hear This!

This one is going to be very brief. I kind of overdid it when planning the anniversary reviews, putting in a lot of things in because of their cultural significance as opposed to their significance in my own life.

Still, 20 years of "My Cousin Vinny" is no mean feat. It's still, in my opinion, the best Joe Pesci film, the best Marisa Tomei film (Oscar Deserved!), and the best Ralph Macchio film of all time, and I'll fight anyone who disagrees. It also has a great swan song role for the late Fred "Herman Munster" Gwynne.

I love courtroom dramas (especially "Twelve Angry Men" scenarios, but that's beside the point), and I love well-written comedies. This effortlessly blends the two. See it if you haven't, and if you have see it again.

I'm done with this guy.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012


It's been ten years since a film came out that to this day has me doubled over in laughter whenever I watch it.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Anniversary Reviews

One of the things I'm going to try an keep up on are anniversary reviews. Every year for the next ten years, I'm going to try and put out reviews of some of my favorite films, shows, books, and games that are celebrating some decade anniversary (music's a bit too much). I'm going to try and post each year's schedule on or around New Years so that your readers know what to expect. Naturally, I missed that mark this year, and so I'm giving you my list now of when to expect my reviews. Naturally this year, May will also include January-April releases - I have to catch up, after all! - and I'll try to complete them by the end of next week:

((UPDATE: This is the way things are being done from now on. Important Milestones will be listed in ITALIC and those I'm actually going to do will be BOLD))

Kung Pow: Enter the Fist - 10 Years (Jan)
My Cousin Vinny - 20 Years (Mar)
The Godfather - 40 Years (Mar)
Nosferatu - 90 Years (Mar)
FernGully: The Last Rainforest - 20 Years (Apr)
Spider-Man (film) - 10 years
Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones - 10 years
Encino Man - 20 Years
Alien 3 - 20 Years

Lilo & Stitch - 10 Years
Batman Returns - 20 Years
E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial
Blade Runner - 30 Years
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan - 30 Years

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (film) - 20 Years
The Secret of N.I.M.H. - 30 Years

Pink Floyd: The Wall - 30 Years
Bambi - 70 Years

Kingdom Hearts - 10 Years
Batman: The Animated Series - 20 Years
Rabbit Seasoning - 60 Years

Red Dragon - 10 Years
Dr. No (film) - 50 Years

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (film) - 10 Years
Treasure Planet - 10 Years
Aladdin - 20 Years
Bram Stoker's Dracula - 20 Years
Sonic the Hedgehog 2 - 20 Years

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (film) - 10 Years
Chicago (film) - 10 Years
A Few Good Men (film) - 20 Years
Toys - 20 Years
The Dark Crystal - 20 Years
To Kill a Mockingbird (film) - 50 Years

Looks like I've got some work to do...

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Cheating on your MMO

Where do people get this notion of only playing one video game at a time?

I can understand when it comes to a subscription service and someone can't afford more than one. But that's not what seems to be going on here.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Fandom and Hatedom

Even though this isn't exclusively a Star Wars blog, Star Wars is my most favorite of favorite things (narrowly leading, but leading nonetheless) and so you'll probably hear more about it than anything else on this blog.

My previous post outlined my position on the films, but it was tongue-in-cheek and a bit aggressive, so I just want to explain it in a more...diplomatic fashion.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

In Order to Call Yourself a Star Wars Fan, You Have To Like Star Wars

Has this happened to you? Have you met someone who claims to be a fan of Star Wars but then mercilessly berates the newer films as a travesty or worse?

Well, what are the main flaws so many people cite about the prequels?

1. Annoying Comic Relief:

2. A Whiny Main Character:

3. A Poorly-Scripted "Romance":

4. Cheesy Dialogue Performed with Too Little or Too Much Emotion:

I think what we've proved is that if you don't like the prequels, you don't like Star Wars.

A Few Brief Words on The Clone Wars

This will be brief for now, but I want to let you know what's in store.

There's quite a few Star Wars blogs that give reviews of the episodes of the Clone Wars series as they air. When I decided to take the plunge and start this blog, I thought "I'll have me some of that."

So when Season 5 premieres in the fall, I'll be giving my own episode dissertations. There will probably be better ones on some of the sites I've linked on the side, but what the hell. It's fun.

The difference here is that I'm still a Clone Wars newbie. I saw the pilot film in theatres because my wife won free tickets. I thought it was a decent Star Wars EU story, but I couldn't get past the CG. I'm all for computer animation when it works, but I find it overused and I thought the character models were ugly.

So I stayed away from the series. But over the years I kept hearing how awesome and Star-Warsy it was from all sections of fandom. So early this year, midway through Season 4, I finally said "You know what? I'll check it out."

I did and it was awesome.

Why am I telling you this? because if I'm going to start a series of Clone Wars reviews, some of you may wish to see what I thought of your favorite episodes from past seasons. Well, I'm sorry but you won't find it. Even though I caught up on Season 4 during the "May the 4th" event, I'm still out on 1-3. I've seen "Bombad Jedi" on YouTube. That's it.

Of course I'll see them eventually, but you won't see the type of episode-by-episode critique that I'll be doing from here on out. Just keep looking forward to the fall.

May the Force Be With You.


It's been ten long years, and I've only just started to appreciate you like I should. Funny, because when I first saw you, the feeling was akin to dreaming. Happy 10th, Episode II!

There'll be MUCH more Star Wars stuff forthcoming.

UPDATE: A while back, I submitted my memory of seeing Clones for the first time to the Star Wars Prequel Association Society for their Clones Anniversary tribute. Well, it's up there now along with many other people's stories of seeing the film for the first time. Check it out in the link to the right.

Let's Go to the Drawing Room for a Sedative

As this is a review, there be spoilers ahead.

My father grew up watching "Dark Shadows", and thusly when the Sci Fi channel aired reruns of the series when I was but a lad, he got me hooked on it. I've forgotten most of the ins and outs over the years, though I've been watching it again in preparation for the big screen adaptation put forth by my favorite partners in crime, Tim Burton and Johnny Depp.

Well Hello There!

Well hello! I am on the interwebz! I have opinions that nobody else cares about, but they mean a lot to me. Therefore, I will use the virtual megaphone and cast it to the wind.

This blog is still under construction and will look prettier by the time I make a real post.